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All that and there were zero Cuban girls to at least ogle at. We spoke to a lady about the true taxi rate for a bit and she let us know she had a friend who rented a casa particular (everyone has a “friend” for whatever you are looking for).When we finally got our bags I went over to a money exchange booth to get a few Cuban Cu C (there are two currencies in Cuba, Money National and Cu C, more on this confusing system later) I walked up and tried to exchange my Dominican Pesos and the gentleman behind the counter was confused. She called her friend and her friend assured her there was room for us.

That’s just one example but there were 100s of the most outlandish lies I encountered when speaking to these people. If someone approaches you asking for a light, be very wary. The “do you have a light” opener never turned out well. Money Nacional is what the Cubans use for their day to day expenses like eating and general buying and selling of goods (one peso is 10 cents USD). Obsessed with the UFC, he liked to talk about fighting and training for fighting.

They come in every color under the sun and I would gauge their median level of hotness as being above that of the Dominican Republic. At least, all the Cuban girls I encountered were whores, and trust me when I say this. Without question, almost every one of them will ask for money, and if they don’t, you are very lucky or you have convinced them that they will get more money later and it’s in their interests to wait (I never did the latter as I feel it’s unethical, yeah me with ethics go figure) Before I go on about the nature of Cuban girls, I should give an explanation about the situation I found myself in.

They are sensual, affectionate, dress well (as well as they can), have style. Before going to Cuba I reached out to RVF member Lavidaloca. What most Americans do when they go there is fly to Cancun, and then on from Cancun to Havana.

Kind of what a Casa Paticular is to a Hotel, a Palador is to an expensive restaurant) 8. Castro declared that raising cattle in Cuba wasn’t a good idea, so any cattle are off limits. Pork, Chicken, Fish, etc are in abundance, but no beef. This was fun for a few days, but I was so sick of doing this routine that I usually ended up just staying in the nightmare room and listening to the Michelle Thomas method for Spanish 10. You can get an ETECSA card for between 6-10 USD (or Cu C) that will let you get online for an hour. At these fake Paladors, you would be paying between 20 – 25 USD. Cubans are helpful and don’t mind stopping whatever they are doing to be of assistance.

The trouble of course begin that if the connection is shit, you’ll be waiting for 5 minutes so the page will load. Cubans are very friendly people and normally when someone just walks up to you and wants to talk, you should be wary. Cubans can make anything fucking work with nothing but spit and dental floss. If you want directions or want to know where a nearby palador is, don’t ask Cuban girls. Cuban men are who get’s things done, ask a man and he will tell you where you need to go. When walking down the street, it looks like you could be mugged at any moment. While not so great for the Cuban people, the policia there will not fuck with you if you are a tourist.

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